The Way I See It

We still haven’t heard the results of my sister’s test. Normally, I would assume because of that all is probably okay, however, her doctor isn’t that type of doctor. Last time, after her cat scan, we had to wait a whole week before we knew that she needed that pet scan. So I wait with my breath held for news good or bad. Meanwhile, Joey, who was transferred to the nursing home just a few days ago, has once more been rushed to the hospital. It seems he was filled with congestion and water and they attempted to remove the mucus/liquid from his body. By 9pm last night the nursing home staff realized his condition had taken a turn for the worse. It seems they put him in a wheelchair after being in bed for weeks, gave him a shower and then his congestion surfaced.

As of 2am this morning he was still in the critical area of the emergency room and they determined he now has pneumonia and the return of the sepsis. The hospital physicians haven’t said that his organs are failing or if they did, Gerrie hasn’t heard it. He is suffering though and that is so hard for Gerrie and Barbie to bear and like most loving family members they want him to stay with them. I feel so heartily sorry for all of them. Loving my Brother-in-law Joey as I do and knowing him all these years makes me believe that he knows his family well and being unable to communicate the job they have (of deciding the best way to help him) is agonizing. I don’t believe Joey is aware intellectually of anything that is happening to him, but he can still feel pain and he is at the mercy of the medical profession,who rightfully, are looking to preserve his body without regard to his state of mind. I know inside myself that the medical professional, in Joey’s case, is looking for the family to direct them and in this case the family is looking for the medical profession to direct them. I believe it then becomes an extended family matter to look at the situation from all the sides and to support and encourage the family members who need to make this agonizing decision. Joey no longer can manage to do anything at all for himself and unfortunately, ever since his accident he has become extremely ill. With each new ailment that hits him it gets harder and harder to watch him suffering. It literally feels like a dagger in my heart, so I can just imagine how it must feel to his wife and daughter. All I pray for everyday is for Joey to get peace, being treated with the utmost loving care and to be pain free. He deserves no less. I also pray, that my niece Barbie finds the strength she needs to deal with all of this, and her mom’s flip flopping. I know my sister wants Joey to stay here forever and I don’t blame her, but I also think she needs to assess Joey’s true condition and then, with her daughter, make the best choice for Joey and not them. I don’t want to sound callous or indifferent and I apologize if I do. All I want is for my entire family to have a chance to end the waiting that is always a part of our existence.

Whatever happens, whatever decisions are made, I hope and wish for them to be made on the basis of love and mercy. That is all anyone could want in these situations and all that the good Lord could grant with his mercy.

Still waiting, here in Brooklyn,
K