Forgetful ~ apt or likely not to remember
forgive ~ to cease to feel resentment against; to give up resentment of or claim to requital; to grant relief from payment of; the act of forgiving ( is defined as forgiveness )
September 11, 2019 Eighteen years since my life and lives of my loved ones changed forever. Finding the words to impress an indelible impact on all Americans is a daunting undertaking, my decision to take it on is a constant insistence from my heart and mind.
Since the day after September 11, 2001 people who survived have been preaching forgiveness and love, looking mostly from fear or empathetic tendencies to find a reason why an extreme group of people chose to kill people, maim people and destroy the American economy. No thought had ever entered the minds of the attackers about the people they were to kill that day or of those who are becoming ill with fatal results from the recovery efforts made that day. They just listened to whatever their leaders were telling them. They were conditioned by the circumstances of their personal surroundings and looked at us as the instigators of their circumstances.
It is easy for anyone to look at America and think spoiled, over indulgent, egotistical human beings living in a country with wealth in nature and personal gain. Those of us born here or who have made their home here know that description is a false front created to make the youngest Nation appear the strongest. Our strength is great, not because we have a capitalist ideology, but because the majority of Americans tend to be tolerant, accepting and compassionate toward all living things. Those are our main sources for survival.
American extremists tend to focus within this country, rarely if ever, venturing outside its borders unless provoked or our compassion or our savior nerves are triggered. Provoked on September 11, 2001 is a huge understatement. We were not ready to forgive and personally, deep down, regardless of my Christian upbringing, I have found it no easier to do so although 18 years has passed. I have struggled throughout my adult life to empathize with those who hate our country and its’ people. I have yet to understand why forgiveness seems necessary when those who attacked us then still hate us the same way today. When we were forced to accept the atrocities that were necessary in World War II both at home and more devastatingly abroad deep down we realized and recognized it was done to stop evil. The people of Japan and Germany and others, who were attacked by us back then have forgiven us, not because they were taught to forgive as a natural way, but because they knew and recognized that what America did was done to stop evil from spreading. Have we completely forgiven ourselves? No. The rebellion in the 1960’s during the Viet Nam war showed us the folly in involving ourselves in another country’s internal strife. We may have helped the people in that region by fighting for them, but we also knew, deep down, it wasn’t necessary. The people of that region also knew that and so it ended on a sour tasting note. The evil there was internal.
Back to the attack on September 11, 2001. The struggles, turmoil and devastation in the Middle East has historically been a constant. Our compassionate nature kept us involved mainly as helping allies and intelligence gathering. Yes, we created weapons that helped our allies in their fight to maintain whatever peace they could. Yes our financial investments in the wealth of resources from the Middle East benefitted the wealthy in all the countries involved, including our own. Was greed morally correct? Absolutely not. However, it was a way of life for all those involved. And answering for morally incorrect actions is a judgement that is answerable only to our own internal moral compass not a judgement to be made by extremists who used a terror attack to somehow punish us for a way of life that allowed us to live in peace accepting our own issues of struggles and dealing one on one within our borders with all or differences and unfair practices. No matter what some choose to believe, spreading evil was never before, nor now, ever a trait of the American people. Evil is something we all abhor and fight against with everything we have.
That day, September 11, 2001, evil formulated by extremists who tried to punish us because they hated our “peaceful” way of life attacked us, killed our people, maimed our people and it continues to kill and maim all those who were at the sites in New York City, Pennsylvania and Washington DC and Virginia.
We have politicians and actors alive today who mock and push aside the attack on this day. We have our own people asking us to forgive the haters who attacked us that day. Our Christian and all other faiths tell us how we must forgive those who hurt us. That to forgive is divine. I will never be divine, for I can not erase what I bore witness to that day eighteen years ago on September 11th, anymore than I could forget or forgive a murderer or rapist. I will never forget nor forgive the haters who tried to cripple our country in every way but most significantly by killing and maiming my own countrymen and countrywomen. It was not necessary and yet they did it anyway. They accomplished nothing of what they originally sought. The evil is still rooted in the haters across the oceans, the Iraq War has yet to truly end, the Middle Eastern countries are still fighting their centuries old wars within their own countries, and the people in every country around the world try to live a peaceful co-existence despite the evil that lurks around them. We didn’t win and they didn’t win. If accepting that is classified as forgiveness then so be it. However, deep down as a witness to evil at play, my heart does neither forgive nor forget and I never will.
The Way I See It here in Jackson!